Jon Gruden pulled his name out of this year’s coaching vacancy wheel by telling Chris Tomasson of the St. Paul Pioneer Press, “I don’t want to be considered for any of these jobs. I don’t want to be considered for anything. There are plenty of good candidates out there. I’m just sick for the guys who can no longer coach their teams . . . I’m hoping to do the best I can to hang on to my job.”
ESPN just hired Tim Tebow, and a suspicious sort would think that Gruden may be joking a little less than he lets on.
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The meeting between Mark Davis and Dennis Allen is probably less about his own job and more about those of his assistant coaches, because that's what happens when an owner decides to meet with his head coach after firing season. In other words, Allen's confidence about his longer-term security is likely to wane a bit next week
In sum, there's security, and then there's rent-to-own security.
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If Southern University really needed a game as badly as it seemed to when it booked Champion Baptist, it should have tried to book the Indiana Pacers. That way, it could have known the joy of losing, 116-12, rather than winning by the same score. I mean, if sports are supposed to be educational, the lessons should be for everyone.
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New York Magazine got a copy of E-mails between Alex Rodriguez and New York Yankees president Randy Levine, and we’ll summarize it this way: Levine is a real jokester, he really liked Rodriguez until it became company policy not to, and the next round of messages between the two ought to be even better. As threats of legal mayhem often are.
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Washington Wizard Marcin Gortat wanted to give capital sports fans something to feel better about in the face of all things football.
Thus, after Washington’s 106-99 win at Detroit in which he managed only eight points and three rebounds in 28 minutes, he offered this mea culpa on Twitter:
Hey wiz fans!! Great win!! Im sorry i played like s..t:((( i have to be better on the glass!! Im glad other guys stepped in !!!— Marcin Gortat (@MGortat) December 31, 2013
As long as he said “the other guys” didn’t step “in it.”
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In other Twittrfication, tight end Tony Gonzalez of Atlanta said goodbye as you expected he would:
What an amazing ride it's been! Thank you to anyone who has ever rooted for or against me. I've enjoyed every second I've had in the NFL!— Tony Gonzalez (@TonyGonzalez88) December 31, 2013
I bet he wasn’t nearly as enthused about the people who rooted against him, but that’s probably just me.
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Quietly, the word “quenelle” is becoming part of the lexicon of sport. A quenelle is an alleged inverted Nazi salute made popular in France by comedian Dieudonne M'bala M'bala, who performs the gesture in his act. Dieudonne claims the salute, pointing one straightened arm downward while touching that arm's shoulder with the opposite hand, is not anti-Semitic, but both Tony Parker of the San Antonio Spurs and soccer star Nicolas Anelka (West Bromwich Albion) have been captured using the gesture.
And no, “It’s a French thing” doesn’t really cover this. Parker apologized, and Anelka said he meant only to support his friend M’bala M’bala. But if you see it a third time, then we’ve got a problem.
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And finally, Bruce Allen told the Washington press corps Monday in the wake of the de-Shanahanning of the team that owner Danny Snyder “is still one of the great fans. I mean, he wants to win more than life itself.”
So does Violator, but you don’t see Raider owner Mark Davis promoting him to a position of influence from the Black Hole to the Alameda offices.