The Drug Enforcement Agency’s surprise raid of six NFL teams, including the 49ers, may come to nothing, but if it comes to something and the 49ers now have this to go along with everything else, it will be one of the worst seasons a good team ever had.
And we’re still not sure how good a team they are. They’re still seventh in a field of six, and between the Jim Harbaugh turmoil, the players who have lost the love of Sourdough Sam, the brownish turf, the perpetual parking, the convection oven in the east-side stands, the injuries, and the general meh-ness of Colin Kaepernick, a drug scandal would be the last straw in a year that will always make Jed York throw up on himself.
[RELATED: 49ers comply with random DEA inspection]
But if it helps, Sunday was the 32nd time in 72 games in the last three years and change in which they’ve tried three or more field goals. If nothing else, they are downright Amish in the red zone.
[RECAP: 49ers defense comes up big in win over Giants]
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It didn’t take long for Harbaugh’s name to be inserted into the discussion of Will Muschamp’s successor at Florida, but judging on the 49ers’ offense, Harbaugh may not be the right fit for the Gainesville temperament.
On the other hand, he’ll definitely make Steve Spurrier stay three more years at South Carolina, so there’s certainly that.
[MAIOCCO: Culliver delivers interception ball, support to Harbaugh]
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The Raiders, who are 5-5 against the line and 5-5 against the over (but 0-for-their-last-16 in the real world), are owed a second by the National Football League. Mark Davis will trade it in for a nice thought or two when the franchise relocation window opens in 2 ½ months.
[RELATED: Report: Davis says LA 'great option' if Oakland hopes run out]
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As we survey the NFC South, Carolina could win the division at 5-10-1. Please let this happen, NFL, and you can run all the rolling pharmacies you want – as long as you make Roger Goodell do the Super Bowl press conference in a lab coat, a stethoscope around your neck and a rectal thermometer in your pocket.
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Frank Gore has as many touchdowns as J.J. Watt, but that’s a little cheap. Watt also has as many touchdowns as the Oakland running game has in total – though the Oakland running game has 27 more first downs through 10 games.
Yes, 27-0. Which is to say, the Raiders get 2.7 first downs per week on the ground.
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Tony Williams, the Saints fan who stole a souvenir ball intended by Cincinnati wide receiver Jermaine Gresham for a Bengal fan named Christa Barrett, will have learned two valuable things from Sunday’s Bengals win over his team.
One, you’re an adult, you’re not going to play with the ball, and all your friends will think you’re a creep every time you tell the story of how you got the ball.
And two, you can say, “It's very simple. I caught the football,” as he told the Cincinnati Enquirer, all you want, but you’re still a creep.
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Marshawn Lynch tempted the NFL to fine him $100K for refusing to talk to the media after Seattle’s latest loss, but (a) I’m sure he doesn’t mind paying it, and (b) the league better hope he hasn’t been getting illegal painkillers from the Seattle training staff, because he just might talk then.
[RELATED: After loss, Lynch takes shot at Seahawks' front office]
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The Troy Grosenick Era is . . . well, who knows how long it will last, but he is the first Sharks goalie to win his debut with a shutout while being nine years old.
[RECAP: Grosenick shuts out Hurricanes in NHL debut]
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If the Packers and Steelers make it to the Super Bowl, they must wear their throwback uniforms. This must be made a federal law, and any senator or congressperson who stands in the way of this must be impeached, tried, convinced and imprisoned.
True, the punishment won’t fit the crime, but you know they all have jail time coming for something else. Or, as my parents used to say when I got a random one over the earhole: “That’s in case you do something and I’m not here to catch you.”
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Love the way the Italy-Croatia European qualifier was abandoned after the field was inundated with flares. Amazing how many cars broke down on the pitch at the San Siro at the same time.
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And finally, the Philadelphia 82ers are one-tenth along the way to the greatest achievement since the 1919 Black Sox. I know you don’t have 29-point halves or 53-point losses in you every night, lads, but stay the course. The gentle forehead kiss of history awaits.
