Arizona governor Jan Brewer surprised us and didn’t wait until Friday to veto Arizona SB 1062. She did it Wednesday, thereby sparing Roger Goodell a few days of lobbying to remove Super Bowl XLIX (that’s 49 to you non-Romans) to a less retrograde clime.
It would have been fun to watch the NFL have to pull up roots, but the right thing was done, albeit not before Arizona became a punch line again. Maybe next time lawmakers there will think before they stink.
X X X
NFL quarterback-in-training Blake Bortles told Dan Patrick that teams asked about his girlfriend, Lindsey Duke, during meetings, which suggests that the NFL Combine is not just about asking players if their mothers were prostitutes any more.
“Nothing was really that bad. I got a couple girlfriend questions,” Bortles said. “If I had one, some awkward . . . ‘If we come to town will she be there for dinner’ and stuff like that.” Yeah, because dinner reservations are always part of the NFL quarterbacking experience.
Bortles later told Patrick that he thought teams were likely more interested in his reactions. “They knew going into the meeting, and I think that was kind of the angle to see how I react to that," Bortles said.
Makes me wish Bortles had had the presence of mind to punch one of them very hard in the thorax and said, “Sorry, but I have a bit of a problem with potential authority figures asking me questions that are demonstrably none of their freaking business.”
X X X
Speaking of people with occasional authority issues, Richie Incognito had his Ferrari damaged by vandals, which may or may not be related to his place in the news over the last several months. Our guess: People who take bats to cars are either members of the mob or people who don’t pay attention to the news much, so we’re going with random idiocy.
X X X
Miami Marlins president David Samson, whose reputation outside baseball not only precedes him but largely matches his reputation within the game, was the first person voted off Survivor. Evidently he dismissed the abilities of a teammate, and that didn’t sit well with those who eagerly ejected him from whatever godforsaken set location the show was filmed.
In other words, art imitates life, and complete lack of art does too.
X X X
Marketing took another swift kick to the nethers of sport Tuesday night when Parma played host to Fiorentina in Serie A. The Parma players lined up before the game gave their Fiorentina counterparts small robotic vacuum cleaners to their opposition as part of the club’s 100th anniversary celebrations, not because it is Italian soccer tradition but because Parma’s current shirt sponsors, Vorwerk, make and sell the Folletto Robot VR100. Weird enough, but we mention it mostly because Chris Wright of Who Ate All The Pies used this deathless phrase to describe it:
“The sublime hoover gesture came (because Vorwerk) insisted that they assist in the anniversary in the only way they know how – giving the gift of automated suction.”
X X X
And finally, yes, I do love John Madden. And no, context does not matter.