Hurray! Manny Pacquiao and Floyd Mayweather are closing in on that big fight you’ve all been waiting for. Bob Arum says Pacquiao has agreed and the only hurdle now is Mayweather’s approval.
The undercard of the promotion, called “Fights That Are Way Past Their Sell-By Date,” will include Willie Pep and Sandy Saddler, Rocky Marciano and Joe Louis, and Larry Holmes-Gerry Cooney -- four of whom are dead.
And yes, what we’re trying to say is that the federal authorities should prevent either fighter from receiving any money for striking each other, ever. This is a fraud (oh, and no word yet from Mayweather’s camp on the story), and should be treated as such.
And if that doesn’t work, try this: If you watch it (not pay for it, but just watch it), God will smite you. Trust me. I was at the meeting.
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The best story you’re not paying enough attention to is Kurt Busch’s ongoing fight with his ex-girlfriend, Patricia Driscoll, in which he claims that she is a trained assassin who has been involved in covert violent missions. Which is sort of what trained assassins would be involved in as a general rule.
“Everybody on the outside can tell me I'm crazy, but I lived on the inside and saw it firsthand," Busch said on the stand Tuesday when asked by his attorney, the famously theatrical Rusty Hardin, why he still believed Driscoll is a hired killer. Busch appeared in court again over Driscoll's request for a no-contact order.
Busch said Driscoll repeatedly asserted her assassin status on missions across Central and South America and Africa, and told of one incident when the couple was in El Paso and she left in camouflage gear and returned later wearing a trench coat over a blood-stained evening gown. He also said that Driscoll had claimed that a female character in “Zero Dark Thirty,” the film that depicted the CIA's hunt for Osama bin Laden, was a composite of her and other women.
“These statements made about being a trained assassin, hired killer, are ludicrous and without basis and are an attempt to destroy my credibility," she told AP later. “Not even Rusty Hardin believes this. I find it interesting that some of the outlandish claims come straight from a fictional movie script I've been working on for eight years.”
Frankly, these people should be ordered to remain together just to see the final gunplay-laced race around the Daytona International Speedway.
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Dave Stewart is now Nerdvania’s Public Enemy No. 1, which both sides surely relish.
Stewart, now the GM of the Arizona Diamondbacks, was discussing free agent pitcher James Shields and went full Luddite.
“I think James is a throwback guy by the way he goes about his business and the innings he pitches,” Stewart said. “I think the fact that Tony (La Russa) is here and that we have more baseball people – he probably sees us as a true baseball team vs. some of the other teams out here that are geared more toward analytics and those type of things.”
“Those type of things?” Bill James says, “It’s on, Daddy.”
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Mikhail Prokhorov is selling the Brooklyn Nets, proving several things:
One, even billionaires notice when they loose tens of millions.
Two, signing your favorite players from a decade ago is a poor strategic choice.
Three, some sucker will pay through the nose for the team and make Prokhorov the best team-flipper in sports history.
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Boston radio host Scott Zolak (former Patriot quarterback) saw this thing happen at Gillette Stadium after the Patriots beat Baltimore. Courtesy our brethren and sistren at CSN New England capturing the radio snippet on "Felger and Mazz," Ravens wide receiver Steve Smith and former teammate/local radio host Jermaine Wiggins nearly went to Fist City over Wiggins calling Smith as a “bully” on the air.
Zolak:
“So [Smith] sees Wiggy and he’s like, ‘Yo, what’s up?’ (Wiggy) says, ‘Hey, Steve, what’s up?’ (Smith) is like, ‘No, dude, what the f---‘sup?’ Wiggy’s like, ‘Aw, now, now you’re swearing in front of my kids . . . And he’s like, ‘You gotta step up.’ And then it starts getting nasty. Steve’s like, ‘Man, you called me a bully. What’s up with that? You know what I’m going to do? I’m going to f--- you, right now.’”
After others interposed their bodies to keep things from getting snippier, Wiggins allegedly took the last shot, saying “‘I’ll tell you what you are. You’re the same thing you always been! You won’t do nothing! You won’t do nothing! You’re a b----! You won’t do nothing!’”
No blows were struck, and the nation is poorer for it.
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And then there’s serious fighting, like Kyle Long and Martellus Bennett, teammates on the Chicago Bears, unfollowing each other on Twitter, and then arguing on Twitter about it. How this team won any games is a mystery.
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Then there’s the world of journalists quitting the sport they cover out of disgust, like Manchester United fanzine “Red Issue.” Co-founder ‘Zar’ cited the tiresome nonsense of modern soccer for his departure (and apparent return to his home planet, where a name like “Zar” seems normal).
“The game we’ve been clinging onto is gone. Football now is happy-clappy families, half-and-half scarves, tourists and selfie sticks; there’s no point trying to fight that. We’ve been through all these points and arguments over and over again during the last 20-odd years raging against the killing of a culture that’s long been deceased. A United employee told us recently, ‘Everyone in the club offices reads Red Issue. It’s like the antidote to working there’.
“But where’s our antidote? The B---S--- Industry’s become overbearing, and we can’t stand the stench any longer. You can only kick against the pricks for so many years before the toe caps on your boots wear out.”
And go team!
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But then there’s true love and admiration, like John Elway thanking John Elway for the Broncos’ season. I wonder why, given what else happened in the building this week, why Elway didn’t fire himself too.
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And finally, Calgary Flames rookie Johnny Gaudreau is trying to copyright the name “Johnny Hockey,” as it was bestowed unto him when he played at Boston College. On the one hand, you can understand why he would want some control over his nickname.
On the other, control over your nickname is not in keeping in the spirit of nicknamery. You think Z-Bo is making money off being Z-Bo, other than the Z-Bo-y things that Z-Bo does as a function of being Z-Bo? Gaudreau has to let this one go. If he’s meant to be Johnny Hockey, it will happen organically.
Besides, he’d better enjoy it while he can because Connor McHockey is coming out next year to clean everybody's clocks, nicknames and all.
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