We told you before this that the Pablo Sandoval story would never stray too far from our faces, and damn it, we were right.
USA Today’s Jorge Ortiz is the latest to put the quarter in the jukebox and get multiple plays. The new topic: The Giants were relentless about his weight, and he was tired of their relentlessness.
“I’m a professional and I know what I have to do,” Sandoval, currently listed as 5-11, 255, told Ortiz. “I know where I’ve failed and how I’ve grown up. If I had signed (with the Giants), I knew I would be under a (weight) regimen for five years, and I’m not going to be happy someplace where I’m under that kind of regimen, where I can’t be myself.”
Next topic: Sandoval discusses Tim Flannery’s fetish for acoustic music.
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The Borland Effect has claimed its second, well, Borland, and because everything 49ers circles back to Jim Harbaugh, well, there you go.
Jack Miller, the starting center and best offensive lineman at Michigan last season told ESPN.com that he will not play as a senior in considerable part because of the risk of getting concussed.
“I know I've had a few, and it's nice walking away before things could've gotten worse,” Miller said. “And yes, multiple schools have reached out. But I'm ready to walk away from it. My health and happiness is more important than a game.
“I know it's pretty unorthodox for a 21-year-old to see past his own nose. This game requires such a passion to excel, and my flame is burned out. However, I'd be lying if I said that the concussion thing doesn't scare me a little.”
Again, not a big thing in and of itself, but it’s still one more brick in the wall, kids. One more brick.
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And now, let’s play Translate Theo, in which the general manager of the Chicago Cubs discusses agent Scott Boras’ challenge to make the team bring spring strobe light Kris Bryant to Illinois for the start of the season, even though he has been ticketed for AAA.
“I have a lot of respect for Scott (no he doesn’t) and he by and large does a great job for his clients (to the financial detriment of the teams),” Epstein said. “The only part (only the first of many) about it that bothers me is that he certainly could have picked up the phone before going to the national media about this (he certainly could have taken the phone shoved in a delicate area). He never once called me and asked me if Kris would make the team or anything about his situation (which doesn’t surprise me). So just from a personal level and professional respect (neither of which really exist here), that would have been something that I would have done if I was in his shoes (like hell I would have).
“Beyond that, Scott has a forum and obviously people are publishing what he says (which is why I think the media should burn in the thousandth circle of Hell). He has a job to do and he has a great client who is a fantastic kid (whose choice in agents sickens me). The person who is handling this with the most professionalism and maturity is Kris Bryant. I couldn’t be more proud of how he is handling a very difficult situation (I’d like it if he’d tell his agent to caulk up his piehole). He is getting asked about it every day. He doesn’t get to just go focus on playing the game; he is asked about this from all corners and he is handling himself in a way that makes the Cubs proud (He’s 21 and isn’t a moron, so this is actually a fairly low bar).
“As far as the issue goes and the bigger picture, we are thrilled to have Kris Bryant. We are glad we chose him with the second pick in the 2013 draft and we are glad he is a Cub. I think he is going to have an incredible career and be a part of some really special things here with the Cubs (if I don’t go to jail for shooting his agent).”
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Florida running back Adam Lane became famous in the Birmingham Bowl against East Carolina because he seemed to have soiled his football pants during the game. An embarrassing moment? Are you kidding?
“It was the best thing that could have happened,” he said. “It got a lot of attention and just put me in a place where I was out there publicly and people knew who I was. I really didn’t get a lot of grief from it. A lot of people were really more focused on how well I did in the game than anything. I feel like it was that way because I embraced it.”
All together now? Eeeeuuuwwwwwwww.
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Houston Astros catcher Jason Castro is the prettiest man in baseball -– either that, or his car is. An Orlando area teenager (the Astros play their spring training games in nearby Kissimmee) was smitten enough to leave a ton of post-it notes spelling out “PROM?” on his car in an elaborate invite to the high school dance. Either that, or Castro’s car looks like someone else’s.
He handled it well enough, of course, tweeting, “Whoever asked me to prom a few nights ago, I think intended to ask the neighbor. Hopefully this wasn’t your only effort.”
I fear to think what would have come next.
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But at least it wasn’t this: Hayes McGinley, a freshman lacrosse midfielder at Syracuse, was arrested last week (and suspended by the team) for drunkenly punching two workers from a local cookie shop in a case of mistaken car identity. But a nearly worker named, of course, Big Jim Whitcomb intervened on behalf of the women by knocking McGinley out.
Heroic enough, but it turns out that McGinley’s uncle is actor John C. McGinley, which is apropos only because Whitcomb told Syracuse.com, “That really bums me out because I really like his uncle's work. I used to watch Scrubs after school every day.”
And once again, the value of television syndication shows itself.
